miss u love

its sad when i realize how much i miss him...
i never really had any dreams where i could clearly see his face in them, but i had one the other night. i was lonely and he was there just like how it was before...
i wish things were the way they were before. things made more sense and i wasn't so lost.
i know i can manage on my own, but i feel so empty without him.
i sometimes try to find a substitute but deep down i know no one will ever be able to replace him.
hmmm...first love, first heart break.
i guess its something everyone has to go through.
i like the fact that no one else knows about it thou, i'm able to hide from it and act like it isn't there.
i guess this is just the first break-up syndrome.
i've been moving on better then i had expected but still not as much as i would like to.
i guess it just shows how much he meant to me.
i don't like to get all depressed and all so i just don't think about it much, but i having that dream kinda makes me think that it's catching up to me.
well, only time will tell. i just hope i don't break someone else's heart on the way.